Every day is a new beginning. Every day a new year begins. The first of January and the days that follow are, above all, the time of year when we feel like making a fresh start. That is a good thing. We make plans, tell our friends about them and set off on our plan with great enthusiasm. After a few weeks, we notice our zeal fading and we slip back into our ingrained habits. If that is the case, you may have overlooked a few things.
The courage to leave the well-worn rut.
A vague plan to make a fresh start is not enough. You need insight into your habits, your way of thinking and the patterns you keep repeating. Whether you long for better health, a new relationship, a higher income, more beautiful skin, a more interesting career or a new hobby, first ask yourself what has held you back until now. Take a look at the track you have worn over the years. A track you could compare to a cart that has carved ruts into a sandy lane for years on end. The cart makes the same little journey every day, and so it always ends up in the same place. A rutted cart track may seem idyllic on a romantic walk, but as a road you travel every day it is unclear, you come up against all kinds of obstacles and it offers no alternative outcome. It takes courage to leave your bumpy, well-worn rut and set out on a new path.
Follow your feet. They know the way.
The last two years were, for my business as for so many others, quite challenging because of the far-reaching measures we had to deal with. I felt that the need to make a new beginning was pressing itself upon me. What new beginning? Where? When? How? In what form? It wasn't clear to me. I had no idea. Vague impressions, yes. But nothing concrete. I observed my familiar path. It no longer led me to results that made me happy. It was time to turn my feet in a new direction. It isn't the first time I have done this, so fortunately I carry a kind of deep-rooted trust with me.
It is more fun outside your comfort zone than inside it.
Turning your feet in a new direction is quite exciting. You cross the dreaded boundary of the comfort zone. You have no choice but to leave behind the habits you carry out every day as a routine or a ritual. People are afraid to leave that comfort zone. Wrongly so, in my opinion. It often resembles a far too narrow circle with strict rules, in which life has to be lived to the minimum and in which anything new is experienced as threatening or frightening. The comfort zone has become a restrictive, uncomfortable cage. I know from experience that the playing field outside the comfort zone is much more fun, more colourful and more alive.
Breaking free from the past is a precondition for a new beginning.
I took months to shift my feet. My gaze then automatically turned towards a different playing field. I surrendered to not-knowing and to shaking my dear head empty. Every time you want to make a fresh start, the past tugs at your sleeves. It doesn't like to see you go. It takes courage to let go of certain things, situations and people that have weighed on your shoulders in the past. Every time you do, order, space and room to breathe emerge. It then becomes easier to shift those feet and take steps forward in a new direction. The first steps of your new plan have been taken. First release and let go, then you can move on.
I couldn't have wished for better timing.
I savoured every moment of those months in which I didn't need to know what I ought to do next, what actions I ought to take, what the result ought to be. I threw the 'oughts' in the bin and began to explore, full of curiosity, the encounters, perspectives and experiments that came my way. I started putting things in order, both within myself and in practical matters. Not that my surroundings are such a mess, but a different kind of order was asking for my attention. I followed the track. The beginning of a new track. It made me happy. Just like that, happy all by itself. Around the bend in the road, yet another new order was waiting for me. And another, and another. Then, all of a sudden, when I wasn't expecting it at all, on 1 January 2022 everything fell into place with crystal clarity. I couldn't have wished for happier timing. The hints and insights formed a single whole. The sun is now shining on the new path.
Let go of the result.
For the next six months, or perhaps even a year, I will immerse myself fully in getting to know this new path, which for me is quite a challenging one. I am letting go of the result. In business coaching, they say you should keep a clear goal or result in sight. That has never worked for me. What does work for me is enjoying every step along the path and opening myself to a beautiful result. What I then receive is often far greater than anything I could have set as a goal. Some of my clients want to know the outcome before they are even willing to set off. As a result, they don't set off at all and keep on dreaming of a new beginning.
I understand that you would like to know what my new path involves. Allow me first to explore it and get to know it in all intimacy, and with the dedication that is so much a part of me. At some point, a visible result will no doubt emerge from it. What kind? I don't (quite) know yet. I am setting off on a journey along the road of my new challenge. We are only a few days past the first of January and I have already learnt a great deal. Step by step, I am shaping my journey. I feel an intense gratitude to see an unknown world opening up before me at the age of sixty.
A new outfit for the journey of your dreams.
Dear reader, in 2022, step beyond your limiting circle. Throw away whatever no longer serves you. Treat yourself to a new outfit. Take one last look back and follow the adventure of your dream. Love yourself very much along the way. Remember to feel deep gratitude for the wonders of life. I wish you a far-reaching and enriching 2022.
With zest for life,
Hilde Van Bulck.
Awareness Architect — Speaker — Author — Systemic constellation facilitator and adviser
AMI Activator — Motivator — Inspirer
