Half the year has gone by in the meantime, but for me it has already been a rich and an enriching year. Several times I set off somewhere to make room for a pause to study or to rest. One of those, three weeks taking part in the constellation retreat of Constellators International in Malta, gave me a boost — not that I really needed one at that moment, but total immersion for such a long stretch in the world of systemic constellations does something to a person. Not only did I meet many interesting and dear colleagues from all over the world, I also looked at myself differently. My self-image as a constellation facilitator changed. I saw my worth, my expertise, among that of the others. I saw what I had already contributed so far to the unfolding of systemic work in my fields of interest. That is no small thing. More than I had ever imagined. I saw the results of my whole process of growth. It touched my heart. In emotion, in recognition of myself, in humility and simplicity. It touched my soul, which whispered softly: ‘You hadn’t realised yet. Now you have.’ There is still a great deal of potential that may be shared more widely.
My soul whispered: ‘You hadn’t realised yet. Now you have.’
These past years I have had considerable challenges where my physical health is concerned. Since April one of my knees has been letting me know day and night that it is not in top form. It is not the least bit ashamed to have kept me out of my night-time dreams for three months now and to have limited how far I can move. Sometimes the pain is more than I can bear. The search for healing and improvement is a challenging but exceptionally fascinating journey.
Many years ago I was given a constellation as a gift, in which four main themes emerged that would shape my life and in which I would develop my skills. I have been through the first three and they have left me with a great deal of wisdom and knowledge. The fourth life theme was a conscious deepening into physical health. Well, I have been in the middle of it for a couple of years now. Before you start thinking that I am complaining here, I really must bring that train of thought to a halt.
Just like other challenges, physical ailments are not there to irritate you, but to widen your conscious BEING. That widening does come with plenty of ‘ouch’ and ‘aah’, but it is an intriguing search between different worlds. Conventional medicine, which tells me without batting an eyelid that nothing can be done about it, and my intuition, which tells me something else. It is not always easy to follow that second road and to understand the messages correctly, but the step-by-step improvement in the intensity and the frequency of the pain confirms that this is the path to follow. As always, the universe turns around you and leads you not only to your own self-healing capacity, but also to people with particular knowledge or ways of working in this area. A path to follow, then.
Your physical ailments are not there to irritate you, but to widen your conscious BEING.
Just as last year with my coronary arteries, my body is showing — now through a different function — that the intense situations from my personal past are behind me and that the body now has the strength to bring itself back into a healthier condition by way of so-called defects. It has the energy for it now and the circumstances are favourable. That is how I see it. Going deeper into the subject frees up space, uncouples me from old patterns and from a consciousness that no longer serves. Those last two are not quite right, actually. The patterns and the old consciousness were as good as loose already. Otherwise the new could not descend. All I can do, in humble observation, is be grateful for such genius. How rich I am.
I say ‘YES’ to the invitation.
The greatest richness I experienced this summer, however, was of an entirely different kind. It had been years, it was not planned and it came completely unexpectedly. A simple proposal. An invitation to go camping. In the Ardennes, on the banks of the Semois. Mindful of my knee, I wondered whether this was really a good idea, but thirty seconds later I said ‘yes’ to this invitation. What is more healing than nature? What is more powerful than nature? Spending the night in a jungle tent looking out over the Semois babbling past. Veils of dew floating above the river in the morning. A pair of swans visiting me regularly in the inlet by my pitch. Ducklings romping about together, doing a workout against the current or demonstrating where the aircraft builders got their inspiration. An otter coming to inspect a dead tangle of branches. Tourists drifting past in their kayaks.
A happy memory surfaced, as though this situation were a miniature replica of my stay in the Amazon rainforest years ago, right beside a river — without the tourists, admittedly. Being surrounded by green from morning till night makes every need for a digital screen disappear. The screen I was sitting in the middle of stretched three hundred and sixty degrees around me. Always up to date, never boring. A natural detox. I needed nothing else. I could have stayed for weeks. I had just come back from a luxurious seaside holiday. And yet my luxury here was far greater. It was the simplicity of everything that made me the richest woman of this summer. Good to realise once again how many things we do that have no connection with nature. And yet there is a magical, invisible but tangible healing process in it. Richness in simplicity. That is the greatest luxury. I am grateful.
With a zest-for-life greeting
Hilde Van Bulck