Dear reader,
Have you heard the terms that were used to describe the year 2020? Some of those words I would never even put into a conversation of mine, and I do not much feel like repeating them here either. They were eagerly taken up, though, in the socially distanced conversations in the street and in the supermarket. And it is true. Many serious things happened. Many of our fellow human beings are going through difficult and harsh times, many have lost a loved one. There is every understanding for that, and hopefully enough support from the people around them too. But what is also true is that many beautiful things happened in 2020. They received little or no place in the media. Yet they deserve a place of honour, because they shift the focus, get energy flowing, increase hope and offer perspective. They do much more besides. They reduce and neutralise fear. And fear is precisely what paralyses us, makes us crawl into a little hole, makes us experience the world as dark so that the solution seems nowhere to be found. From fear you look for external factors to give you confidence. You wait for someone to stand up, take the lead and tell you what you would best do. Your critical capacity to sense what is right and what is not falls away. You tend to follow slavishly and to become a plaything of your fearful emotions.
It is a discussion I regularly have with my course participants. They say: ‘I am standing in front of a wall. I cannot move forward. I am standing in front of a closed door. I am being held back.’ And then they go on fixating on the wall and the closed door. Why is that wall there? Why is that door closed? Where does it come from? Why me? Sometimes I literally place them in front of that wall and that closed door and ask them to look at the possible exits or solutions. Do you know what happens then? They keep staring at that wall or at that door. They feel powerless and see no perspective. Literally never does it occur to them to take hold of the door handle and open the door, or to turn away from the wall. In both cases a different situation arises, the landscape looks different. Oxygen comes in, a different picture, a road that shows itself. Relief, movement and a new idea can come into being.
Why not try the above out for yourself? Take a situation you are struggling with and in which you see few possibilities. Go and stand with your gaze directed at a door or a wall. Notice what happens in your body and in your emotions when you look at your problem this way. Take the time to observe the physical and emotional sensations. After about five minutes, turn around. And observe again. What changes in your breathing, in your muscle tension, in your feeling and in your thoughts? Chances are you feel better. And that is precisely what you need in order to take steps.
Of course it can be worthwhile to trace the origin of a difficulty in order to get a better view of the road towards a solution that can be travelled. My feeling is that far too much attention is often paid to it. It has become a kind of conditioning. Shifting the focus to the point you want to reach is also a possibility. I find that people initially struggle with that. By looking at the things that are going well, at the light shining in, by having an eye for the life that surrounds you in the animals, in the plants and of course in yourself, you gain a better sense of yourself. Your view widens, the window opens. Joy settles in. You are able to take the next step, and another, and another. Before you know it, the thin layer of fear that lay over your theme has been neutralised and you can make plans again and/or enjoy yourself to the full.
It need not take up much time at all. When a course participant or a client sees no perspective and panics as a result, I have them do a simple exercise: name out loud all the objects around you, with their colour and shape. Almost instantly things become calmer inside.
The person had become trapped in a thought form or a belief. By turning the gaze outwards for a moment, space then arises to turn the gaze inwards, not towards the thoughts, but towards the point of balance. The point of inner calm and an infinite field of being and possibilities. The essence of who you are is felt and fed. There you find the signpost that widens your consciousness and shifts your focus from powerlessness to strength.
How many beautiful things did you yourself experience in 2020? Inwardly and outwardly? How many beautiful things did you see? How many beautiful things that took place in the world do you know about? How many beautiful things do you see in the people who surround you every day?
To give you some inspiration, I refer you to the article in MaatschapWij entitled: ‘Things that did go well in 2020.’
What would it be like if, from day one in 2021, you spoke three beautiful things about or of yourself out loud every day? You can also say them to other people. That is even more powerful, isn’t it? What would it be like if every day you consciously went looking for five beautiful things that touch you? You will certainly find inspiration in your immediate surroundings. You could also go looking for news that focuses on progress, love, resourcefulness, togetherness or other values you find important. What would it bring you if you could keep this up for a year?
Dear reader. I wish you a year 2021 brimming with beautiful things. You are already one of them.
Hilde Van Bulck
AMI Activator, Motivator, Inspirer